Rob's Confessions, part 1

We recently moved, and life is a bit crazy. We finally got internet hooked up, but there's so much else on our plates that blogging is not even on the back burner- it's in a box in a closet somewhere, along with most of my books and badminton rackets.
Anyway, I thought I'd share a few mildly humorous confessions- this one being the first:

I am so technologically challenged that when my internet is slow, I check the cord for kinks, because part of me still thinks of it like a water hose. I imagine a kink in the hose and a great big back-up of information filling the cord. Once I straighten it out, I'm just sure that everything will move faster...
Sometimes I think I make our I.T. guy cry...

Year of the Tiger

Another new year = Fireworks aplenty. Today was the fifth day of the Chinese New Year, the day on which we welcome the arrival of the money god. Apparently, the money god likes a lot of noise. Perhaps he is nocturnal- because the fireworks went all night. Even now, 24 hours later, I still hear fireworks every other minute. I get pretty cynical about the money god, because even though most people here would say it's only a tradition, superstition, nothing they really believe, the god of most people in this city really is money. Can I be both judgmental and tempted at the same time?

Anyway, it's nice to be back in our apartment after a few weeks away. Our lease expires in 3 weeks, though, and we've decided not to renew. It's time to downsize. One year ago, we really did need a place this size, but things have changed over the past 12 months, and we're looking for something smaller and cheaper. It'll be sad to not have a kitchen that both April and I can fit in at the same time, but who knows- maybe there's another one out there somewhere :)

Sunshine, Sicknesses, and Smiling Babies

So I feel somewhat humbled and embarrassed. After my weather rant a few weeks ago, we've ended up having the mildest December I've ever experienced. I think I need to apologize to the universe (or at least the local weather system). April keeps reminding me that December isn't always that bad. It's January and February that you have to look out for, so maybe my nibbling on humble pie is a bit premature. I still think we've had a few amazingly sunny weeks. My apologies to the atmosphere.

In other news, I'm just getting over dysentery. Chalk that up as one sentence I never thought I'd be saying (or typing). First, I never thought I'd get dysentery. Second, I didn't realize dysentery was ever not fatal, so I couldn't conceive of "getting over" it. I think when I was young I read too many missionary biographies where the protagonist has a friend or loved one die of dysentery. Apparently, there's plenty of non-fatal versions; though for a few days I was pretty sure I was a goner. It's good to be able to once again eat food and keep it in my body for more than a minute. Major kudos to April, who for the first 3 days of my dysentery (which actually went undiagnosed until day 5) also had to care full-time for Helen. Helen went back to her foster family on Saturday.

And just so this post ends on a happy note, let's close it with some appropriately censored pictures of Helen. The one of April feeding her is possibly one of my favorite pictures from the past few months:

Welcome Helen

As promised, here are a few Helen videos. The organization that set her up with us asks that we not show pictures or videos of her publicly without blurring or blocking the eyes.



Helen will be 1 year old next Monday, but she's developmentally more like a 5 month old. She had surgery to remove a large something (not sure if it was a tumor, sack of fluid, or what) from the back of her skull, and the bone still hasn't re-formed back there, so she's really sensitive on the back of her head. She also has a shunt (don't worry, I had to look that word up, too) in her head that drains the excess fluid down into her stomach. Because of her special physical needs, she's been in foster care since her surgeries. We're watching her while her American foster family is out of the country for a few weeks.

She sleeps most of the night, which is good. But she can get fussy during the day. 'Fussy', for the uninitiated, means she may cry and scream for 2 hours with no apparent reason. But like most babies, when she's happy and sweet, you forget the fussy times:

Helen Arrives

We got our foster baby today. Helen will be with us for 2 weeks. She'll turn 1 year old on the 28th, had surgery a few months ago and is with us while her foster family is overseas for a few weeks. We'll try to get some pictures and videos posted soon. Right now we're a little busy with our trial run at parenting :)

It's crazy (Rob's reflections)

Something I have found morbidly entertaining in East Asia is that whenever someone commits or attempts murder (including suicide) or causes some other atrocious, headline-grabbing spectacle, the news reports that the person was later determined to be suffering from a mental disease. When you press the issue further, you find that this is a society that believes you would have to be mentally messed up to do anything like that. It's a real, live Catch 22.
"Why did he stab his boss?"
"Because he was crazy."
"How do you know he was crazy?"
"Because he stabbed his boss."

Well, forgive my naivete, but could there be another explanation? Could the reason be (warning: four-letter word ahead) EVIL? For years I have brushed this off as an quirk of East Asian culture. But then, a few weeks ago, I read an opinion column on the Fort Hood shootings, and within a few sentences the author said he "takes for granted" that anyone who would shoot other people has a mental disorder. Have we gotten to that point? Has evil been factored out of the equation? How long until we realize that, without that component, the equation will never add up?

One thing I appreciated about George W. Bush was his unabashed re-introduction of the concept of 'evil' into public dialogue. He spoke of certain people, actions, ideologies and even governments as just plain evil. He also took a lot of flack for that, but I for one admired it.

C.S. Lewis, 60 years ago was writing about the danger of seeing criminals as nothing more than mental/emotional/social problems that just need to be 'fixed'. is it too early to call Lewis a prophet?

Thanksgiving Weekend Recap

Thanksgiving weekend is always a little different here. Last year both of us were sick, so we stayed at home and ate the most American meal we could find in our fridge- hot dogs and baked beans.

It's strange when holiday traffic is the same traffic you face every day (frightening in it's own way- we'll write about that another entry), when Black Friday is just another Friday, and you need to work your turkey cooking schedule around your classes.

This year, we joined some friends for a traditional turkey dinner that was truly something to be thankful for. Dinner was followed by games of "heads up seven up" and "apples to apples", since the traditional football games wouldn't be on until after midnight (and even then they wouldn't be aired here).

Friday was a busy work day, Saturday was mildly restful, then on Sunday we went back to the orphanage. Rob left his guitar at home this time, but singing a capella was just as fun. We had twice as many volunteers than we expected (which was great!). When we arrived, we had a chance to do a personal interview with the director of the orphanage- learning that one of the girls from last time, an 11-year-old who had never spoken a word, started singing a few weeks ago! When we showed up, she sang for us some of the songs we had taught them last month!

The last hour of our time was a lesson in humility and servanthood. We put ourselves at the orphanage's disposal to do whatever work they needed. So a few of us ended up outside digging rocks out of a path that they hoped to one day pave. There was some grumbling about whether or not this was the best way to complete the task and some questions as to whether or not we should just give them the money to hire someone to do a professional paving job, but in the end, we learned to quietly submit ourselves to those whom we were serving. Sometimes serving others only works when it's on their terms, not ours.

All in all, a great holiday weekend (despite Rob's swine cold), but I do wish it would have ended with a Steelers victory in Baltimore.

Thanksgiving

Perhaps I (Rob) was a bit hasty (and negative) in my venting about the weather. This week has been a beautiful autumn week- cool but not cold, sunny, crisp...
So of course I got sick, Maybe I got that "Swine Cold" April was talking about. April, for her part, is in class this Thanksgiving Day, because there's no such holiday in East Asia!

So I'm trying to learn thankfulness. I'm realizing that default mode for me is to only be driven to thankfulness when I am in want. When something is lacking, I realize that I shouldn't take for granted what I do have. Even that phrase, 'take for granted' speaks a lot to me. I take for granted, that is, I assume will always be the case, that I have food, general health, friends, shelter, etc. I never envision a world where I lack these things.

True thankfulness sees even the 'givens' as gifts. Ironically, we call them "givens" and mean that we ought to have them. We are entitled to them. But the word "given" even points to the gift, and the gift points to the Giver.

So Happy Thanksgiving! We hope you are able to celebrate in a warm home, with a full plate of food, surrounded by loved ones. Good gifts all around.

The Blahs

November in our city can be a pretty nasty month, weatherly speaking. Pardon me while I vent and revel in a moment of discontent.

It's usually in early mid-October that Summer makes its hasty exit, like a social butterfly who just realized she has a better party to go to somewhere south of the equator. Summer is followed by what might be called the season of Autumn, but around here, it's less of a season and more of a short reprieve. But it's usually an enjoyable two or three weeks here. Then Winter shows up like an angry bully with something to prove.

Winter: "So you liked all that sunshine and warm weather, eh? Well let's see how long you can last without it! I can make the sun disappear for so long, you'll break out the Coppertone the next time you see a streetlamp!"
Me: *cough, cough*

Spring? Spring is as fleeting as Autumn, and it doesn't start until mid-April. Ugh. Our extended forecast calls for rain and cold. The meteorologists here have the easiest job for the next 6 months. "Weather forecast? Uh, sure. How about- mostly cloudy, 50% chance of rain, high of 45 degrees." There you have it. I have predicted the next 6 months of weather with depressing accuracy.

Rob has his seasonal cough/sniffles from the sudden change in seasons, and April wishes that humans were capable of hibernating. It's just a blah kind of day.
And the Steelers lost. To the Bengals.
Maybe tomorrow will be better :-/

Why I'm Glad, not Mad (a domestic update from Rob)

Warning- this story has a lot of background and little point, but it does give a good snapshot of the mundane aspects of our daily life.

A few weeks ago, I read an article online about 'creative uses for household items'. It suggested using old tissue boxes to hold plastic bags you intend to re-use. Since our city banned the free distribution of plastic bags at grocery stores, the stores now charge for bags, so we use cloth bags and hoard our plastic bags for later use. As a result, that frightening under-the-sink kitchen cabinet (you know what I'm talking about) is packed full of various bags, cleaners, and always a few surprises. So when I read about the great idea of storing plastic bags in old Kleenex boxes, I eagerly awaited the day when we finished off one our our boxes of tissue.

Then April got a cold. She claims she has the "Swine Cold."

This morning, when the first (and later second) box went empty, I cleared out the cabinet and stuffed plastic bags into tissue boxes. So far, I love it. But here's what made me really happy:

East Asia trash bags are frustratingly thin. In all my years here, I've never pulled a trash bag out of the can without it tearing in some way. Sometimes it rips completely open. I've taken to double-bagging in the can. During our trip to the States this past spring, we brought back some wonderfully thick trash bags, which we used up after a few months. Or so we thought...

This morning I discovered a whole new stash of unused American trash bags. I'm so happy :) Now we have a better way to get rid of all those used tissues...